Outstanding citizen~ Beautiful home in exclusive upscale community ~Educated ~ Successful, we should even add wealthy to the list. All the great things people in society used to identify Nancy Lanza;she picked up the tabs at the local BAR. It was stated Nancy and her ex-husband had a nasty divorce. No-one has ever mentioned Nancy was a great teacher to her students. No one has mentioned the capacity Nancy played in her students lives. I am most certain, they all live in that same community. Nancy who was your partner?Did you have one? All the material things she has and the money she spent on Bar tabs have been mentioned, how she loved talking about her arsenal of guns. People talk about her keeping her personal life close to her, not talking about it at all. Nancy where you hiding something? Surely the characteristics of a woman such as yourself, you would talk about your sons, you would talk about your guns, I would expect you to talk about how wonderful your students are. Makes me wonder, due to the horrific embarrassing, shameful act committed, your community continues to protect who you really are. Cover ups due to shame, your community fills filthy, they fill like they have been RAPED. Yes, they have been RAPED. Due to the filth, disgrace,embarrassment, guilt;the community FEELs, they will NEVER tell the real truth, of who you are. They won’t tell us you were a drunk, they won’t tell us your mouth was as filthy as a sailors. They won’t say , you had mental issues and they all knew it. No, your community will not speak upon this until years, later. Those parents, that desire to heal will feel the effects of mental illness. It’s said to say, but it is true. They will learn, mental illness is also created by the impact of traumatic acts,death,abuses,divorce. Those families will deal with coping skills, so will make it, some will not. Nancy you have scarred society, but you have also opened the door for conversation of standing up, speaking Up. Nancy in many of our eyes you are an abuser You didn’t seek help for you or your child. Nancy if you were the Sexual ABUSER of course you wouldn’t seek help. You would not want your secrets, known; Now they identify your sons mental illness as:
1. difficult to influence or direct an intractable disposition
2. (of a problem, illness, etc.) difficult to solve, alleviate, or cure
3. difficult to shape or mould, esp with the hands
intractability , intractableness n
They cause of your anger Nancy, THEY SAY;
Most divorcing couples experience something close to emotional breakdown at the outset of a divorce. Psychologists say that next to a spouse’s or child’s death, divorce is the most stressful event for married people. It takes most people more than two years to regain their equilibrium and move on with their lives after they decide to divorce.
Some people mask their depression with anger. While depression can be paralyzing, anger tends to be energizing. However, using anger to avoid mourning the end of a marriage can be dangerous. It’s normal to be angry; it’s not normal to obsess about getting even with your spouse for causing you this pain. Some people get stuck in the hostility and anger phase and spend years blaming their ex-spouses for everything that goes wrong in their lives. Acknowledge your anger. Express it safely — in counseling or in conversation with a good friend. Never express anger without restraint. If you can recognize anger and accept it, you can control it, rather than letting it control you.
Some experts compare the emotions of divorce to those experienced when a loved one dies. The death of a marriage often generates feelings of sadness and loss, and a similar mourning period occurs. However, there are some important differences. Divorce has no ritual form of mourning, no memorial service that brings you the support of friends and family. In divorce, your friends tend to back away, hoping to avoid taking sides or getting caught in the middle. Divorce is often accompanied by a sense of failure that is rarely part of mourning a death. Also, the formerly loved one is alive and kicking and may be making your life miserable.
I say your divorce was the trigger for you of something much greater, that demon from your childhood, came out. The demon of abuse that you harbored for many years thinking it was under control, the reality, it was sleeping like a bear, waiting for the opportunity to awake. Maybe it was already, woke and no-one wanted to face it. Now we ALL FACE IT. If you need help RAINN.org
Always love Teresa